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Bedtime Café (the Jonahs of this world)

Nollywood actress Genevieve Nnaji whispering to you to have a regal night’s rest. (Instagram/GenevieveNnaji)

“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.” – Albert Einstein.

Lionel Messi reigns in football and his legs execute the skills archived in his brains. Undefeated boxing great (Floyd Mayweather) has got legendary fists; Usain Bolt’s legs were wired for pace and he made his name, fame and fortune sprinting.

Have you woken someone up for something important to him or her and (s)he got so angry because he was enjoying in his dream what he was obviously missing in real life. Like a woman who had empty bank accounts and just #50:00 left in her purse but as she was about receiving $50,000,000 gift from Bill Gates you woke her up! And she became a lioness that pounced on you and nearly made a mince meat out of you.

Seriously now we know one or two people who are talented in sleeping but because sleeping isn’t sports we don’t see them as gifted. Lol

Familiar things are usual and unfamiliar things unusual … now if all humans have two heads if we see someone with one head he becomes news … and if providence bless humanity with one eye if we behold a person with two eyes we perceive as alien ….

We all know one or two people who are gifted, skilled in the art of sleeping but we don’t celebrate such but if someday sleeping becomes sports – the first to sleep, perhaps the one that slept longest or the Jonahs of this world (the log of wood) who never wakes up no matter the noise or distraction in the environment then they automatically become talents and up-and-coming stars.

I knew a fellow classmate in high school who obviously had  talents but the one you see at sight was sleep. He sleeps effortlessly and once he puts his head on the table he’s gone. What a bundle of talent he was. Not sure if it was him or someone else who slept in the examination hall.

Sleep is sweet but it could be very bitter and embarrassing if we observe same at an odd place or hour and go on to add the seasoning called snore instead of knorr and so we send invites to all eyes around to come feast – if there are 200 people in the facility then ideally 400 eyes are on you alone.  All eyes on me – sorry on you!

Sleeping in church on Sunday. I used to be guilty of this, no thanks to my habit of surfing the Internet and sleeping late in the night.

Some commit the crime of sleeping in lecture-halls and many times their lecturers sentence them by sending them out. The most embarrassing is sleeping in the House of Assembly as a law-maker and your skills are shown on national TV as well as social media and so your skills begin to trend offline and online but it may not end there for your family might bear the brunt. 

“Your daddy was elected to go represent the people of his constituency but he spent 4 years exhibiting his sleeping talents!”

His political opponents may even use such to campaign against him or her in subsequent elections.

“Our constituency slept for 4 years because our representative was busy snoring and competing with Biblical Jonah but dust in lieu of fish swallow all our files.”

Lovely night’s rest to you all!


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I won't bore you or box myself by defining who I'm, what I'm or where I'm headed. I AM OLAYEMI JOSEPH OGUNOJO, a Nigerian and World Citizen and a student of the 'University of Life.' If you impart knowledge into every Tayo, Tanko and Tagbo you meet, they will impact every Tom, Dick and Harry they confluence.
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