Prince and Princess of Sussex Harry and Meghan credit: REUTERS/Mark Blinch
Men and women are not only different physically and biologically but mentally too and some things you take for granted as a man mean a lot to a woman.
If she cooks and uploads a foreign meal or usual meal in a unique way she expects you to comment as well as commend her on her creativity and thoughtfulness.
If she styles her hair and comes home looking take me home to mama, she didn’t expect you to take her to her mother-in-law but talk about the hair. Is it fair or fabulous, does it make her smart or smarter?
As a married or engaged man I guess you know women generally and your partner in particular.
Women see blunt as boo so it’s a taboo. If you’re blunt she feels you don’t cherish, worse still don’t love her enough but if you’re diplomatic she sees and feels love and affection and believes your comment is from your heart.
“Baby how do I look?” from her, demands diplomacy and flattering from you. “I thought you were a queen but tonight I discovered my sweetheart had transformed to a princess!”
Please know and note that she has an idea of how she looks before asking you but she wants to enter your mind to see and feel your heart and what you say is how she sees your heart.
True fans don’t bully their favourite celebs, do they?
And if you say something negative she perceives you as ingrate, negative, offensive and then assumes that for you to express ‘dislike’ you probably don’t like or love her again and then she begins to feel insecure, jealous and that’s invite to other negative thoughts and feelings.
Only an available partner sees his wife’s new hairstyle, only the one at close contact eats her meals to experience her newly-acquired culinary skills, strengths or mistakes; only the one at proximity grants her listening ears even if the issue is amoeba-like.
Women are intrinsically expressive where men are repressive. And talking, chatting they use as tools to fights stress; don’t forget publishing words orally burns calories and aside these facts, talking is social support, creates one, sustains and maintains same.
In the light of this if you’re available you’re giving her assurance which is a form of insurance to your union.
In rounding off an ideal man thinks of his home and family when not around and many feel guilty if they are not available enough.
I know their unavailability makes you feel insecure at times, bearing in mind that it could mean proximity to another woman – PA, female colleagues, restaurateur, club girls and that connote temptations … nonetheless show understanding and tolerance and try make his home warm, inviting and tempting instead of nagging him for being away for too long for that could be a disservice.
If he comes home unusually late and keeps you awake, anxious, waiting … he has a premonition of you nagging … but if you didn’t and instead express love and understanding and affection, that’s a miracle from you and believe me he’ll reciprocate in cash and kind!
Sweet dreams and lovely night’s rest to you all.